Thursday, June 4, 2015

Mississippi Mission

Credit: Lancy Loney's Facebook page

Here’s another one just getting started tomorrow.  I’ll add their blog to “Favorite Blogs” in right column.  As with Dale Sanders and company, it may really be interesting to follow their adventure.  This trip, by Corey Smock and Lance Loney, is called Mississippi Mission 2015, and is dedicated to raising funds for suicide prevention.  Check out: http://paddleforprevention.weebly.com/blog.

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Paddle Pilgrim

Credit: author's webpage

Paddle Pilgrim: An Adventure of Learning and Spirit, Kayaking the Mississippi River, by Dr. David R. Ellison (self-published, 2013, 122pp, 85 b&w photos)

If his biographical site is current, Dr. David Ellison is a Professor of Children, Youth, and Family studies at Trinity Lutheran College in Everett, WA.  His trip down the Mississippi River was done as a sabbatical and took place in 2012.  It wasn’t until near the end of the book that I learned that he had written it to supplement the blog he has done during the trip.  That helped to explain the brevity of the book.  At 122 pages, fairly large print, and 85 pictures, making almost one to a page, it is a very, very short book.  So, I had to go searching for the blog.  It may be found at http://paddlepilgrim.blogspot.com/, and has the pictures from the book in color, along with many others that weren’t in the book.  You may find the blog of interest.  Also, here is the link to a video he did about his trip that I found on his Facebook page.  He started the trip in a folding kayak, which did not survive, so you’ll later see the red kayak he replaced it with. https://www.facebook.com/dave.ellingson1/videos/10206207373084673/?pnref=story


It’s unfortunate that the book wasn’t done as a stand-alone project, but it does provide the reader with a flavor of the trip.  In spite of the tougher paddling, he likes the river above Minneapolis much better than the remainder of the river because of the abundance of wildlife and more enjoyable scenery.  Also helpful was having companionship on that first leg.  Jim Lewis, author of Ka-Ka-Ska-Ska, which was reviewed in this blog previously (2/18/15, accessible in blog archives), accompanied Dr. Ellison on that initial section.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Canoeing The Great Plains

Credit: Amazon.com
Canoeing The Great Plains: A Missouri River Summer, by Patrick Dobson (Univ. of Nebraska Press, Lincoln NE, 2015, 193pp.)

This is a very readable and enjoyable book.  It is about the restorative and rehabilitative powers of water and a canoe.  Patrick Dobson reveals he was without direction and pretty much at the end of his rope.  He didn’t know who he was, where he wanted to go in life, or how to meet his responsibilities.  The situation is well explained by the title of the first chapter---  ‘Doomed.’

The story starts in 1995, so he’s had time since then to test how his trip helped him mend and grow.  His journey began as he stepped off his porch in Kansas City and started walking, walking about 1,250 miles to Helena, Montana.  His intention was to return to Kansas City by canoeing down the Missouri River, but as he walked across the plains, the closer he got to Montana, the more apprehensive he became about the fearsomeness and size of the mighty river.   A talk with a fishing guide in Helena didn’t help when she assured him that he would die. 

His canoeing experience amounted to passing out drunk in the bottom of a canoe ten years earlier with no memory of how he got home.  Thinking he might benefit from some paddling instruction, he sought the help of an outfitter, who recommended an instructor.  The instructor took Dobson and his 16-ft. purple canoe to a Helena park lake.  When he tried to teach the author how to J-stroke, Dobson flipped the canoe.  When he tried to teach the author how to sweep, Dobson flipped the canoe.  He finally told his student to always wear his PFD; he was going to need it.  Hoping his instructor would contradict the fishing guide’s doom and gloom, he asked the instructor if he had paddled the river.  The response was basically, “Not me.  Too dangerous.”  Mr. Dobson’s start was as unsteady as his confidence, but the river quickly taught him what he needed to know.  Not only did the author make a go of it, but he became so comfortable with the river life that his apprehension grew about how he would manage when he got ‘home.’  He had learned enough by the time he was within a couple weeks of his destination, that he took another dejected paddler under his wing, who was about to quit, and helped him finish his trip as well.  Along the journey, you will share every emotion and every mosquito between Helena and Kansas City, and by the last page, you also will feel better for the experience.

Thursday, May 21, 2015

The Big C

I've been asked whether or not I was going to blog about my predicament, being diagnosed with prostate cancer.   I still have mixed thoughts on that.  The main thought is that everyone has health issues in their lives, so you all may not be interested in hearing about mine.  The only reason I bring it up here now is to explain why you'll be exposed to a lot of book reviews in the next couple months.  I'll have surgery in a couple weeks, and will be inactive until the end of July.  Then it becomes an issue of how long it will be before I feel like sitting up in a canoe for 10-12 hours a day.  In the meanwhile, I'll be doing a lot of reading on canoeing, kayaking, and camping.  At least I can give you some insight into a number of titles and authors.

There is, however, another side of the coin as to why you may be interested in all this.  I found it very difficult to find information on this problem.  Without speculating as to why this may be true, I've learned a lot.  Whether for men, or women wanting to take care of the health of their men, I'll share if asked.  Until I can get back on the water, I hope you enjoy the reviews.

Monday, May 18, 2015

Listening Point


Listening Point, by Sigurd F. Olson (University of Minnesota Press, Minneapolis, 1958, in its 5th printing in 2011,  243 pp, illustrated by Francis Lee Jaques)

Sigurd Olson was one of the greatest conservationists of the 20th century until his passing in 1982.  He was an award-winning activist, best-selling author of nine books, president of the Wilderness Society and the National Parks Association.  His awards include those from the Sierra Club and the National Wildlife Federation for his works.

The cabin at Listening Point
His understanding of nature came from listening to it, observing it, and acquiring a reverence for it.  He was at home and at peace in the wilderness, but it was hard at any given moment to escape to the true wilderness, so he sought an oasis deep enough in nature to be appreciated, yet close enough to escape to when the notion struck.  While paddling, he found a spot on the south arm of Burntside Lake, adjacent to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area, near Ely, MN, that fit the bill.  He and his wife, Elizabeth, acquired the original 26 acre tract in 1956, and later added another ten acres.  It included alder and willow along the shore, upland second-growth birch and pine, a cove and beach, and huge boulders that have rested there since the last ice age 10,000 years ago.  It was only ten miles from home, but in another world of its own where only the sights and signs of nature could be perceived.  Loving to listen to nature, he called it Listening Point.


The shore at Listening Point

There are two ways for you to get to this special place, either spiritually or physically.  The first is by reading this book.  As I mentioned when reviewing another book of Olson’s, The Singing Wilderness, his writing is so detailed, articulate, and of such depth that the reader can’t help but find himself there listening to the loons and woodpeckers, watching the seasons color the landscape, smelling the wood smoke, and being entertained and enlightened by the mice, deer, beavers, birds and all other wildlife.  You can also visit the Olsons’ cabin with permission of the Listening Point Foundation, which was created to maintain and preserve the site.  It was added to the National Registry of Historic Places in 2007.

The Foundation just recently acquired the Olsons’ home in Ely.  Behind it is the garage which Sigurd transformed into his writing shack.  Inside are all of his collections of rocks, books, photographs, and personal items still resting where he left them.  His pipes are in an ash tray by his manual typewriter on which he wrote all his books and papers, and still in the typewriter is a sheet of paper with the last words he typed, “A new adventure is coming up, and I’m sure it will be a good one.”

If you visit the home, where nature programs and classes are held during the year, a member of the Foundation will take you out to Listening Point.  Olson’s other books and related items may be purchased there to benefit the Foundation.  A visit would create a memory of a lifetime, and this book and Singing Wilderness are certainly two that should be on your must-read list.
(Photographs used with permission of Alanna Dore, Executive Director, Listening Point Foundation)

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Carpe Diem

Credit: Aaron Gray

This is the day the Lord has made.  Let us rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalm 118:24

In other words, no matter how bad things look today, we need to put a smile on our faces, have a good time, or make like we’re having a good time, and get on with it.  This is the best day we have.  The Pollyannas will tell us that things will get better.  They lie.  Whiskey and wine are about the only things that improve with age.  Once we reach maturity, it’s a one-way street, and all downhill.  Tarnish doesn’t get shiny, rot doesn’t become solid wood, rust doesn’t become steel, paint doesn’t unpeel, and we don’t get quicker reflexes, run faster, have greater strength, or more endurance.  Our organs get tired and less inclined to do their jobs, and diseases our bodies sloughed off for years and decades are welcomed in and given a home.  If we want joy in our lives, if we want our lives to have meaning, purpose, or fulfillment, if we want to satisfy a dream, learn something new, get a better job, stand-up for ourselves, or find love or happiness, we need to either accomplish it today, or at least set priorities, ignore naysayers, eliminate distractions, and make a serious step in that direction.  And no, 'planning' to do it some time later when we are more ready is not a serious step.  There may be no tomorrow, and even if there is, we’ll be less capable to take advantage of it.  Time is wasting.   Carpe diem! 

Friday, May 15, 2015

Over the Dam


Credit: naznet.com
Lake Itasca Dam

They haven't wasted any time.  According to Dale's SPOT Track, they crossed the dam from Lake Itasca into the head of the Mississippi River at about 10:30 this morning.  The trip has started.  Be sure to watch Dale's Facebook page and follow his track.  Both links are in the right margin under Favorite Links.  

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Anna Goes Down the Mississippi

Credit: Dale Sanders' Facebook page

For any of you that don’t know Dale Sanders’ story, this may be a trip more than worth your while to follow.  First, Dale Sanders is attempting to become the oldest man to solo paddle the full length of the Mississippi River’s 2,340 miles.  He will celebrate his 80th birthday in just a few days.  Second, he is dedicating the trip to his Grand-Niece, Anna, who has Type I diabetes, so his canoe is also named Anna in her honor.  The goal of the trip is to help raise funds for diabetes research in Anna's name..

I have been watching their SPOT tracker all day as they make their way north to Lake Itasca, MN, for the start from the river’s source.  It looks like they should get to Lake Itasca today.  You can follow the entire trip to the Gulf of Mexico by simply clicking the “Follow Anna’s SPOT Tracker” link in the right margin under Favorite Links.  You will also find Dale Sanders’ Facebook page link there as well. 

If you would like to help Dale and Anna, you will find several links on Dale’s Facebook page for making a contribution to their cause.  Thank you.



Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Idleness, Water, and a Canoe

Illus. Credit: amazon.com

Idleness, Water, and a Canoe: Reflections on Paddling for Pleasure, by Jamie Benidickson (pub. by University of Toronto Press, Toronto, CA, 1997, 256pp plus test notes)

On seeing the title, I thought the book would be a light, relaxing read.  The title comes from a 1940 quote from the ‘Queen’s Quarterly’ that states that “the ingredients of a holiday in Canada are idleness, water, and a canoe.   Instead of taking the reader on an idyllic drift down a picturesque stream, it launches into a treatise, a quite detailed coverage of paddling from as many perspectives as you can imagine, and probably some you couldn’t have imagined.   The message is that, at least in Canada, canoes and paddling are woven into almost every facet of life, from inclusion in countless forms of advertising and commerce to political cartoons, romance, hunting and fishing, recreation, exploration, youth development, and spiritual, physical and mental health.  We are introduced to the line of personalities that moved the canoe from a tool of survival to a recreational gem, starting with John “Rob Roy” MacGregor in 1859.  This book may tell you more about canoeing than you ever wanted to know, or it may engender a deeper appreciation for this loved and unlikely member of your family.

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Canoe Sailing

Credit: youtube.com
 
If the idea appeals to you that canoes can fly, you should enjoy this.

Thursday, May 7, 2015

On Being a Mole

We were glued to the TV and computer yesterday afternoon and evening for storm updates.  Storms were firing up right on top of us and then moving to the northeast and continuing up into Kansas.  The tornado shelter was readied.  Of our two cats, one is a literal scaredy cat and vanishes with the first clap of thunder 25 miles away.  She is impossible to find until she comes out on her own hours later, and even if we could find the hole she was curled up in, it would probably take a crowbar to extract her.  I picked up the other cat, Piper, still napping contentedly on the couch, and put her in a cat carrier.  The decision had already been made to move to the shelter when the tornado siren went off.  We had one tornado here with no damage in the immediate area, but the central part of Oklahoma took the brunt of the damage.

One of the intriquing aspects of these tornadoes was how slowly they moved, and much of the damage was caused not by a high EF-rating, but by them going stationary and just churning in one spot.  The area of I-35 just south of Oklahoma City was hit.  One motel was demolished and condemned, another had the facade removed, other normal severe storm damage was done over the area, like the removal of the metal roof over the Sonic restaurant and downing of utility poles, etc., but an RV park was seriously damaged with RV’s rolled, tossed, and stacked all over the place.  The park had a storm shelter, so residents and campers found cover there. 

No deaths have been reported.  There were 5 critically injured last night, and by this morning three have been upgraded, leaving just the two in need of more trauma treatment.  (Update:  A 42-year-old woman was found drowned in her storm shelter in South Oklahoma City.)

Bridge Creek, southwest of Oklahoma City, took a direct hit.  Between 1,500 and 2,000 buildings have been seriously damaged or destroyed in the small community.  A serious indictment of the leadership there was the total absence of any tornado warning system.  The fire department had to drive around the community warning residents to take cover, while the firehouse itself was damaged and the firemen were put in peril.  Any community in such tornado-prone areas that fail to provide a warning system for their residents and businesses are clearly nonfeasant.


The severe storm and tornado risk is low today, about 25%, but then goes to about 55% tomorrow, and up to 95% Saturday with the arrival of a really ugly looking system.  A lot more Oklahomans will be moving underground in the next few days.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Picture of the Day

Credit: Alex Comb

"Rivers know this: there is no hurry.  We shall get there some day."
  A.A. Milne, Pooh’s Little Instruction Book

Monday, May 4, 2015

Border Crossing

I got a shock this morning.  While returning a book to the library, the librarian informed me that one of the books she had ordered for me had come from Canada.  (The Paddlers’ Reading list is in the right margin under ‘favorite posts.’)  She has been ordering me books through the interlibrary loan exchange program.  It was no surprise that a desired paddling title may be available only from Canada, but the postage was a surprise.  I had paid $2 for an interlibrary loan book, but when she went to return it to the lending library in Canada, she had to pay $10 in postage.  Shocked herself, she called them and asked how much they had had to pay to mail the book to the U.S.---$17.   She said that from now on, if a book was only available in Canada, she would have to check with me to make sure I still wanted it.  The implication that I would have to be responsible for the excessive postage was obvious.  I said, “No need to call me.  If the book is only available in Canada, just scratch it off the list.  For $27 I can probably find a used paperback version on line somewhere."  Postage is almost getting to the point where you can seal the book in a dry bag, throw it in the canoe, and paddle it to its destination yourself.  Another example was the GPS bracket I was prepared to order.  It was $12.  The postage for it, which weighed about an ounce, was $24.  I took a ‘thank you, but no thank you’ stance, and will continue just hanging my GPS from a thwart.

Saturday, April 25, 2015

ALWAYS Wear Your PFD!

Credit: Vittorio Marras

There are no excuses.  There are no valid reasons for being on the water without a PFD, yet people keep drowning because they aren't wearing one.  There has been enough research and design to have developed dozens of different PFD styles that insure both comfort and survival.  Find one that works for you and wear it. If you haven't planned ahead, it doesn't matter.  Just take one that's ugly and stiff as cardboard, but wear it.  Either way, put one on before going on the water.  If you are vain enough to worry that your silly friends may comment about your poor color choice, or that a PFD makes you look less than macho, imagine the impression you'll make on the rescue workers that have to pull your alcohol-sodden, hypothermic, drowned corpse out of the water after hours or days of searching.  "Well, another dumb ass that drowned because he thought he could do without a PFD." or "Here's another guy wanting to prove that stupid is forever."  ALWAYS wear your PFD!

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

The Montreal Canoe and the Voyageur

Credit: Canadian Public Archives

As we read the history of expeditions into the New World, we find a nearly unending string of deaths and failed expeditions, especially into the Arctic regions, because the explorers were determined to use European gear and clothing, and stubbornly convinced of their superiority.  The prejudice was indeed spoken out loud that certainly no uneducated indigenous populations could know more about surviving on the barrens and tundra than the Europeans.  Success in exploration and survival didn’t come until the white men finally decided to try local ideas on clothing, footwear, and shelter.  One of these local innovations that the Europeans had no match for was the canoe.

The word canoe comes from the Carib Indian (Caribbean and South Florida) language for the dugout, the ‘kenu.’  The Spanish in the area called it a ‘canoa.’  While there is archeological evidence of a canoe-type craft in the Netherlands dating back 8,000 years BC, the craft was never refined or developed there for continuous use.  The much lighter and more versatile birch bark canoe, however, was a refinement from the First Nations people of North America, or what became known as Canada in 1867.  Since nearly half of the region’s geography is fresh water, about 400,000 square miles of nothing but water, constantly crossing lakes and rivers, hunting for food, warfare, and being able to move from one body of water to another, made the light birch bark canoe essential for survival. 

The personal canoe was generally 14-16 ft. in length, and weighed up to about 50 lbs., which is still quite competitive with the weights of canoes out of modern materials.  To build a country and create its commercial trade, however, a work horse was needed, and that was the Montreal canoe.

Few people think about it, but there is virtually nothing you can touch today that did not get to you by truck.  Many items are moved totally by truck, from raw resource, to manufacturer, to distributor, to store, and to waste disposal after consumption.  Our lives would not exist as we know them without the tractor-trailer, and for that period in history, the 1600’s until the 1900’s, and in some regions until the 1960’s, the Montreal canoe was the region’s tractor-trailer.  The Voyageur, or shipping canoe crewman, was the truck driver and lumper of the day.  They carried European and East Coast supplies into the wilderness, and exchanged them for hides, which were carried on the return trip for shipment back to Europe.

Montreal canoes were 35-36 feet long, with a beam of up to 6 feet.  The shipping trips would commonly involve 3-4 canoes traveling together.  Each of the canoes were crewed by around 10 voyageurs, and carried 65 bales of goods, which with the crew and their gear could total as much as 8,000 lbs.  The voyageur started his day before dawn, and generally without breakfast.  Breakfast would wait for one of the day’s early rest stops.  They paddled 14 or more hours a day, averaged 50 miles a day, and maintained a 45-55 stroke/minute paddling cadence.  After each hour of paddling, they would make a rest stop, which was measured by the time needed to smoke one small-bowl pipe of tobacco, and often without getting out of the canoe.  When they couldn’t paddle because of rapids, they would line, pole, track, roll the canoe across short land obstructions on log rollers, or more commonly portage with 4-6 voyageurs.  All hides and freight were pressed into 90 lb. bundles, and each voyageur was responsible for portaging six bundles from take-out to put–in, carrying two bundles at a time.  While most portages were more reasonable distances, one was eight miles and another 12 miles long, in which case the voyager carried for a half-mile, and rested while walking back for the next two bundles, and was expected to complete the round-trip in an hour.  Thus the longer portages were made in stages across the total distance.  The voyageurs commonly wore colorful sashes around their waists.  Voyageurs had little room in their lives for fashion statements.  Many think the sash wrappings were to help prevent hernias from the heavy loads, as strangulated hernias were an agonizing and not uncommon cause of death for these men.

The early French trapper/traders were usually independent and solitary operators.  In 1670, however, the Hudson Bay Company was created with a one-and-a-half million square mile grant from Charles II.  That is 40% of the land mass that became Canada.  Unlike the French trappers who received little or no support from the French government, the officers of the Hudson Bay Company were well connected both politically and financially.  The beauty of the Hudson Bay Company was that their ring of forts and posts around Hudson Bay and westward into the interior cut the time needed to complete a round-trip into the wilderness and back by half as opposed to going all the way back to the St. Lawrence River. 

Voyageurs were now HBC employees.  The Voyageur signed a five-year contract with the company.  To fill these positions, the Hudson Bay Company needed to find men that were used to being close to starvation, living on a diet of half lard and half corn, accustomed to hardship, miserable weather, lives of privation, and very limited resources.  They looked to Scotsmen from the Orkney and Shetland Isles on the Northeast coast of Scotland.  During the Napoleonic Wars roughly a third of their male populations were pressed into the military, most into the Navy.  More were pressed into service on Arctic whaling ships.  The collapse of local fisheries, the failure of crops, and the eviction of farmers from their lands by rich land owners left few resources for their survival at home.  During this period, roughly a quarter of the islands’ populations emigrated to North America, Australia, and New Zealand.  Many who found their way to North America sustained themselves with canoe paddles. 

Saturday, April 18, 2015

Child of Nature

Brian Duncan on the Missouri River

"What sets a canoeing expedition apart is that it purifies you more rapidly and inescapably than any other.  Travel a thousand miles by train, and you are a brute.  Peddle 500 miles on a bicycle, and you remain basically bourgeois.  Paddle a hundred in a canoe, and you are already a child of nature."
Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Spirited Waters

Credit: mountaineersbooks.org


Spirited Waters: Soloing South Through the Inside Passage, by Jennifer Hahn (pub by Mountaineers Books, Seattle, WA, 2001, 211pp.) Winner of the Barbara Savage Memorial Miles From Nowhere Award. 

The passage was from Ketchikan, Alaska, to Bellingham, Washington.  For a naturalist who had worked for fourteen years as a kayaking guide, this trip was a logical evolution.  It is not a night one, night two, night three kind of trip log, but a sensory experience for the reader.  The author takes you through the non-stop challenge from large, foam-crested waves, strong currents, huge tides, up-wellings, whirlpools, wolves, and being surrounded by killer and gray whales, eagles, sea otters, etc.  She shares the experience of spending a couple days with a dying breed, a family of lighthouse keepers.  Then she is adopted for a night by a family of loggers. 

Throughout the books she adds the customs and beliefs of the First Nations people that have called this coast home for thousands of years.  As a naturalist, she also introduces the reader to the continuous living grocery full of delicacies that lie in the tidal zone or just below the surface.  Her meals are enriched with a wide range of seaweeds, kelps, sea urchins, crabs, clams and many other creatures that add to her chowders. 

While this can never be a trip taken for granted, she is honest about the doubts and fears that any paddler should expect to face on such a coast where nature is still wild, and support or assistance is unlikely to be available, or not likely to arrive before it’s too late.  Beyond those fears facing any paddler, she adds those of particular concern to a woman traveling along in such a wild environment.  Male or female, this is a book any paddler will enjoy.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Slice and Dice

 Yesterday was devoted to a Mercy Hospital visit for a little slice and dice.  I don't mean to sound trite, but that's just one more reason why you don't put off your paddling or other dreams until you're ready, the kids are grown, you're retired, or any of those other lame excuses for procrastination.  I do have summer paddling plans, but I've intentionally not made them known, because it all depends on what the biopsy reveals.  All I do now is sit for a couple weeks and wait for the shoe to drop.   Today we're sitting and waiting to see if any funnels drop on us.  I got the tornado shelter cleaned out, stocked with 2 gallons of water, a waste bucket with screw-on lid and 3 rolls of TP, a battery-powered lantern, a whistle to attract the attention of would-be rescuers if we got trapped, and 10 Cliff Bars.  I like making paddling plans more, but we have to deal with it as it comes.
 
 
 
 

 

Friday, April 3, 2015

Mississippi River Transit


The wind has been fierce today, and is expected to continue for most of the rest of the coming week.  It was gusting to 50 mph this morning (Force 9-10 on the Beaufort Scale), and held at 30-35 most of the day (Force 8 or gale), not dropping to 25 mph until sunset.  When I went out for my walk, it wasn’t too bad while passing treed areas and around buildings, but while walking upwind by open pastures, the roar in my ears was so loud I couldn’t hear traffic coming up behind me.

 

Besides getting the flowerbed irrigation system repaired, reconnected, and set up for the summer, I spent some time out of the wind watching Mississippi River In Transit.  I don’t know how I haven’t spotted this before, but if you’ve missed it as well, you may enjoy it.  It is a video-log of four young men paddling the Mississippi River from Lake Itasca to the Gulf of Mexico.  If you’ve fantasized about such a trip, and wondered what it would take to accomplish it, the videos do a very good job of showing the preparations, as well as the obstacles and adventures experienced along the way.  As for experience, the total canoeing experience accrued by the four prior to setting off was---ZERO, but they endured a pretty steep learning curve.  There are 25 videos in the collection done by Peter Bragiel and his videographer.  You should find them both entertaining and enlightening, and they are all accessible at:

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

BOKAG

Credit: dreamatico.com & Google
 

I’ve been involved in public safety almost all my life---with the Civil Defense (Boy, that dates me!), Homeland Security, fire service, police, etc.---but there are still two areas where I remain forever mentally challenged.  To me, warnings that involve public safety, and that require that the public respond immediately in a specific way for their own good, should be clear, concise, and 100% free of possible misunderstanding or misinterpretation. 

 

Here’s the first problem.  About 2:15 this afternoon, a siren sounded.  As I was washing the truck, I stopped and looked around, and there was not a cloud in the sky anywhere.  However, I still have this problem of frequently being unable to immediately determine by the second warble if I’m listening to a fire siren or a tornado siren.  One tells me that if I don’t smell smoke, I should just listen to hear which way the fire trucks go.  The other means I should be running flat-out for my tornado shelter.   I’m sure if I heard them one after the other, their difference would be unmistakable.  However, hearing one or the other only once a week or so, it takes a finely tuned ear to tell them apart, and then only after standing there for the duration of the siren doing a mental juggling act between fire, no, tornado, no, can’t be, fire.  If it is in fact a tornado warning, by the time one decides what the siren is for, you’re being sucked through the front window.

 

I called the town office and asked what the siren was for.  I was told it was the storm siren.  I asked if there were two different sirens used so they could be distinguished one from the other, and was told, “No, it’s the same siren.”  “Well,” I asked, “is there a different pattern or something between the two?  They sound the same to me.”  “Yeah, one sounds like a fire siren that goes up and down, and the other sounds like a dead animal.”  “Well the one I just heard went up and down, so was that the fire siren?”  “No, that was the storm siren.  It’s the one we sound every Wednesday at noon.”  (Of course it is now 2:15.)  Apparently they were having other problems that prevented the siren being sounded on time.  None of this helped me.  Besides, it’s April first, so I wondered if she was serious or just putting me on.  I guess I have to listen to more dying animals or sit dutifully at noon each Wednesday to listen for the tornado siren.

 

Forecasters often talk about not being able to understand why people hearing a tornado siren immediately go rushing outside to look around when they should be heading for their shelter.   I understand it perfectly.  They don’t hear a tornado siren.  What they hear is a siren, period.  Then they rush outside to see what the heck is going on.  They are checking to see if there is a glow and smoke in the sky, or a funnel.  Then they will know what the siren was for.

 

The other issue I’ve never understood is storm watches and warnings.  There are 1,025,110 words in the English language.  So why did they have to pick two words confusingly close to one another to represent two totally different things?  After 50 years, when I hear one of the two words, I still have to stop and think about whether that is the less serious one or the more serious one.  Between watch or warning, either one could be either the lesser or the greater.  Does watch mean to watch for possible weather developing during the day, or does the word warning warn about possible bad weather?  Why don’t they take one of those two words---it doesn’t matter which one---and use it to indicate that bad or severe weather may be possible and that people should pay attention to weather updates during the day.  Then they could pick another word, like BOKAG for the serious alert requiring immediate action.  BOKAG, of course, being the acronym for 'bend over, kiss as- goodbye.   Now, no one would have a problem understanding that!